


Valentine's Day

by esompthin



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, But with everyone else also liking Alex, It's Lams, Jealous John, M/M, Nervous alex, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-06
Updated: 2017-03-06
Packaged: 2018-09-29 20:15:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10143137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/esompthin/pseuds/esompthin
Summary: John hates Valentine's Day. Even more so because everyone loves the man he loves. And so spending the day with him is impossible.





	

Valentine's Day. A stupid holiday in John's opinion; it was just a day that let people throw their money into forgettable gifts for the most attractive person in town. The red and pink hearts everywhere didn't lighten his mood at all. With each kissing couple he passed, his fists got tighter in his pockets.

"Laurens!"

At the sing-songy voice, all of his hatred was washed away, he smiled easily as his muscles relaxed, "Alexander."

His friend leaned over, breathing hard, "I-I've been looking for you all day."

"I haven't really left my dorm much." John admitted, sheepishly looking down at his feet, "I'm not having that good of a day."

Alex's eyebrows furrowed deeply, "Is something wrong?"

John waved his hand dismissively, "Nah, it's just this day. It makes people crazy."

"Crazy." Alex repeated, he huffed a breath, looking away. "Right."

Alexander shifted his feet nervously, he hid his hands behind his back. Laurens raised an eyebrow at his friend's suddenly out of character actions. "Are you okay?"

"What? Me? Yeah, I'm- I'm fine." Alex cleared his throat nervously, "I just wanted to, uh-"

"Alex!" a feminine voice shouted. The pair looked up to see Eliza Schuyler jogging up to them. She smiled up at Alexander with the light of a thousand suns. John looked away as Eliza blushed and reached into her purse. "I wanted to give this to you. You know, since it's V-day and all."

"Oh, thank you." Alex said warmly, his fingers brushing against Eliza's as he took her gift. A box of chocolates with a card. "I have something to give you as well."

Eliza squealed, "Really?"

Alex's fingers wrapped around Eliza's hand elegantly and raised it to his lips. He pressed a soft kiss there that had Eliza sucking in a sharp breath.

"T-thank you!" Eliza mumbled, staring down at her hand, still in Alex's grasp. Jealousy fumed inside Laurans; he was seeing green and he refused to imagine what Alex would do if he gave him a gift.

"Oh, honestly, Liz, you're so helpless." Another voice said as Eliza's older sister, Angelica strolled up. "Here, Alex, dear, this is for you."

Alex grinned at the flowers in Angelica's hand, and the slight blush on her cheeks. "My Angel, thank you!"

The young man then took the flowers from her and pressed a chaste kiss to her pink cheeks. He watched as Angelica's face turned darker and a dopey smile spread across her lips.

"Y-yeah, no problem."

Alex leaned back, looping his arm around John's, "Now, I'd hate to kiss and run, but we have somewhere to be. Thank you, ladies! Have a wonderful Valentine's Day!"

The boys walked away as the girls melted into puddles, their hands on their burning faces, their hearts excitedly skipping around their chest. Laurens couldn't help but glare at them as they got further and further away.

"Okay, so, um, as I was saying, John, I have something to, uh, well, I should just…" Alex sucked in a sharp breath, "Wow, this is harder than I thought it would be…"

"Alex, what's going on?" John asked, growing worried for his friend, "You're acting really _really_ -"

"Crazy?" Alex squeaked, biting his lip.

"I was gonna say weird, but, sure…" John said, "I've just never seen you look so unsure of yourself. Are you sick? Are you drunk?"

Alex stopped them outside the library, sitting down on the beach outside. He set his chocolate and flowers next to him and John sat on the other side. "No, I'm not drunk, Laurens. I just-"

"Alexander!" The two boys looked up to see none other than George Washington striding up to them. He nodded politely at John, but focused on Alex the very next second. "I have something for you."

"Oh, you don't have to…" Alex started, surprised by the small box Washington handed over. Fear pitched in John's gut as he wondered if it was a ring. But the box was too long to be a ring box. Either way, it meant bad news for John. Alex gasped as he opened it, "Oh, George, it's beautiful!"

Laurens, ever the masochist, leaned forward to see what it was. Sitting in the soft velvet case was a luxurious, ivory, "Pen?"

"It's a marble miniature recreation of the Washington Monument." George said, "There's only five like that one. You told me how you wished to work in DC, but have never actually visited. I thought you might like a keepsake. And it's fully-functional. You can write my speeches with it."

Alex let out a breathy laugh, staring up at George like he was the greatest being in the entire galaxy. "Thank you…"

"Of course, son." George grinned. He was a senior, while Alex and Laurens were only sophomores, so he liked to tease them about their age. Alex jumped up, engulfing the older man in a hug. George laughed, his arms wrapping around Alexander easily, "Alex, please."

"Sorry, I just love this." Alex said as he released his friend. John was certainly _not_ pouting at that sentence. He drowned out the rest of Alex and George's conversation, not wanting to hear all the mushy complements and love confessions. Everyone knew that Alex adored George, and vise versa. Honestly, if George wasn't already engaged to Martha Custis, they probably would've made a move by now. John felt bile rise at the idea of it.

"I have to go now. Martha and I have a date planned. Enjoy yours, Alex, Laurens." George said as he was walking away. Alexander was grinning as he waved goodbye, still lost in his own mind about the pen and his friend.

John didn't want to be a part of this any longer. There was a reason he didn't leave his room much today and this was exactly it. He knew if he was out and about he'd only get jealous at the idea of happy couples, because he knew he couldn't have the one person he wanted most. So John stood up and dusted off his pants, "Hey, so, I only came outside to get some food, so I'm going to-"

"Oh, brilliant idea! Come get dinner with me!" Alex said, snapping his pen case closed. "I know exactly where to go!"

That's how John got dragged along with Alex to a lesser-known food court. It was more eloquent, but no one liked to go to it because it was the furthest away on campus. As they walked, Alex steadily jabbered about the randomest things. But they got John's mind off of all the craziness. They got their food, both ordering pasta, and sat in the furthest corner. John found himself laughing along to Alex's story, feeling light as a feather. Naturally, it had to come crashing down.

"Alexander!"

"Aaron Burr!"

"Sir!"

John's scowl appeared faster than a person could blink. He looked down at his half-finished pasta, stabbing it angrily. He didn't listen to the cheerful exchange between the friends. He didn't notice the gift that was given to Alex or how happy he seemed to get it. And he _certainly_ didn't watch as Alex stood up and pressed a kiss to Burr's forehead. Burr chuckled and swatted him away, a good-natured smile on his face. They said their goodbyes and Burr sauntered off, as quickly as he came.

Alex was smiling as he watched him go, only to snap his eyes back to John when he heard the bitter remark, "I didn't realize you and Burr were so chummy."

"Oh, sure. He's a good guy under all that backstabbing and lying." Alex said, laughing.

"When did this happen?" John asked, pushing a meatball around his plate.

"He had invited me to debate club one night and then everything kind of fell into place. I don't know, he's just kinda cool now, you know?"

John hummed, pushing his plate away, "I'm not hungry anymore. I'll see you later, Alex."

"Wait, oh, shit," Alex hissed as he grabbed all his gifts and scrambled after John, "Wait, I still have something to show you."

John waved his hand in dismissal, "It doesn't matter, Alex. You can show me tomorrow."

"No, it has to be today." Alex said, "It's… it's important!"

John sighed and glanced at his friend sideways, "Look, Alex, I don't feel that good, so can I just go home?"

"Sure. Uh, can I come with you?" Alex asked hopefully. John stared at his friend, finally nodding. Alex beamed at him and suddenly John didn't feel so shitty anymore.

As they walked back to John's dorm, he offered to hold Alex's flowers for him, freeing up some space for the other man to make wild gestures as he talked.

"So then I said-" Alex was telling a story, but got interrupted as he heard his name.  
"Hamilton!"

This time even Alex looked annoyed. He turned and glared at the southern richboy that stalked up to them. "Jefferson."

Thomas Jefferson, their friend, Lafayette's, cousin and a total dick. Laurens grew interested, wondering what the asshole had to say to them today. He was ready to run to Alex's defense, but he knew his friend wouldn't need it. Alex always had a way of taking care of himself on his own. But, to everyone's surprise, Jefferson stuffed an expensive bouquet under Alex's nose.

"Jefferson?" Alex asked as he slowly reached up and grabbed the bouquet. He looked into the southern boy's eyes.

"Don't read into it or anything, Hamilton. Gilbert just wanted me to be _nice_ for the day." Jefferson sneered, glancing over to John and the flowers in his hand, "Besides, it looks like you're already _occupied_."  
Alex cleared his throat, a blush forming on his cheeks, much to John's bewilderment. "Uh, yeah, working on that."

Jefferson's eyebrows rose sharply, "Really?"

" _Yes,_ Jefferson, now if you'd please-" Alex hissed, his face turning darker. He wouldn't make eye contact with John. A smirk formed on Jefferson's lips and suddenly he was pulling Alex into an intense kiss. John dropped the flowers in his hand. His heart crashed down to his toes and his hands were shaking. Tears formed in his eyes as he backed away. A whimper escaped his lips as he turned and ran away from what was before him.

Alex pushed Jefferson away, fury in his eyes, "What the fuck was that?!"

Jefferson merely nodded towards John's retreating form, "Go after him. I'll have Gilbert bring all this shit to your room."

Hamilton flipped the man off and then sprinted after John. He had to, he _had_ to make this right. Alex was faster than John; so, by the luck of God, he was able to catch up to his friend just as he was about to slam the door to his room shut. Alex wormed his foot between the door and the wall and pushed back against John's efforts.

"Let me in, please!"

"No! Fuck off!"

"John, I-"

"I want to be _alone_ , Hamilton!" There was pain in his voice, the sound of oncoming tears. Alex almost backed off, but he couldn't he was too stubborn.

"Just let me give you this one thing, and then you can ignore me for the rest of your life, okay?" Alex was begging now, "I have to try!"

There was a pause, and then the door flew out from under Alex and he crashed to the ground. Looking up, John was glaring down at him, fire in his wet eyes. "Fine. Be quick."

Alex scrambled to his feet and pulled out a folded paper from his back pocket. It's what he's been trying to show John all day. He had to make this right and he wasn't sure how, but he knew, at least, that he should shut up for once. So he didn't say anything as he gave the paper to John.

John blinked at him and then down at the paper, a scowl still on his face. Slowly he unfolded it and huffed out an irritated sigh. "Alexander, this is five pages."

Alex just nodded, biting his tongue. John sighed a long, drawn out breath and closed the door behind Alex. He stared reading as he crossed the room and sat down on his beanbag. Alex stayed where he was, staring down at his shoes, a dark blush creeping up his neck.

Eventually, John set the papers down, rubbing his temples. Alex's heart sank at the sight of his distressed friend. He's not reacting how he's supposed to. He's supposed to be excited. Right? Well, either way, Alex laid everything out in the open. The ball was in John's court now. Alex just hoped he didn't smack it down.

"Alexander-"

"I'm sorry, I had to tell you, it was being bottled up for so long, and I was losing my mind every time you smiled at me and-"

"Alexander."

Alex shut his mouth with an audible clack. Sweat was forming on his back and he felt like crying. John was staring at him like he was an idiot. God, this was the end wasn't it?

"I don't know what this means." John said, gesturing to the small packet. "It's too… convoluted."

Alex let out a shuddering breath, "What?"

"I don't get it."

Alex dropped to the floor, scrambling to find out what went wrong. They were all there, all five pages. Wait. Five? Alex looked up at John, "There's supposed to be six pages. The sixth page, it ties it all together. Where is it? Where's the sixth page?"

"I don't know, but I've had a really long day, and reading your essay isn't exactly what I call relaxing, so could you just-" There was a knock at the door. John felt like tearing out his hair, "Jesus fucking christ now what?"

He stood up and opened the door to find Lafayette standing there, a look of awe and astonishment on his face. There was a light blush on his cheeks and a small tear in the corner of his eye. "Is Alex 'ere?"

"Yes." John ground out, his teeth scraping across each other. His fingers were digging into the wood of his door. God, now this was happening from his best friend? The person he thought he could trust with his feelings? Lafayette was going to hit on Alex right in front of him?

"Will you give zis to 'im?" Lafayette said, holding a single paper to him.

John grabbed the paper and shut the door in his friend's face. Without looking at Alex, he threw the Valentine at him, smoke practically coming out of his ears.

"John." Alex gasped as he skimmed the paper. "John, this is it. This is the sixth page. I must have dropped it with all my stuff."

John scoffed, "Yeah, while you were swapping spit with _Jefferson_."

"John, you have to read this." Alex said as he pressed it into his hands. " _Please_."

John snatched the paper and tore it to pieces, anger and frustration and disappointment swarming in his mind. He wasn't thinking straight and he was taking out his anger on Alex. It wasn't Alex's fault he was fucking perfect and literally _everyone_ wanted a piece of him. It wasn't Alex's fault that John was hopelessly in love with him. It wasn't Alex's fault that John was having the worst day of his life.

Alex looked like he was about to cry when John threw the shreds of paper in his face. He reached out and caught some of the shreds of paper, his movements slow and unintentional. In that moment, his body felt very very cold.

John glared out the window, just wishing to disappear from existence.

"I was trying…" Alex whispered, then, louder, his voice choked off, "I was trying!"

John rolled his eyes, tapping his fingers on the desk. Why didn't Alex get the point? He wanted to be alone during this day. If he had to watch Alex fawn over any other person, he was going to scream.

Alex sucked in a long breath, trying to calm his shot nerves. He closed his eyes, his hands folding into tight fists, and then, he recited what he wrote. And rewrote. And edited. And revised. Until it was perfect. He spoke the words that were shredded to bits on that paper.

"Despite all of that, or perhaps, including all of it, John," Alex said, a shiver in his voice, " I must confess now... Cold in my professions, warm in my friendships, I wish, my Dear Laurens, it might be in my power, by action rather than words to convince you that I love you.

John looked up, his eyes wide. He whispered more than spoke, a breath, really, "What?"

Alex rubbed a nervous hand through his hair, "That's what I've been trying to say all day. I love you, John. I have for years now."

John stumbled to his feet, being caught in Alex's arms. Tears were forming in his eyes, "Say that again. Please, Alex."

"I love you." Alex said, wrapping his arms around John's back. "And if you don't feel the same way, I understand, but I just had to let you know."

"Alex."

"Yeah?"

"Shut up."

The next thing Alex knew, he was being pressed down into John's bed with his lips on his best friend's and nothing in the world could be better than this moment. John decided that Valentine's Day wasn't so bad after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Tell me what you think!


End file.
